Speak Up
ANNA DAVIS, M.D. UMKC SCHOOL OF MEDICINE ALUMNA
The room was full of people: nurses, doctors, medical students You’re sitting on the edge of the bed, holding your mom tightly Your knuckles white and eyes darting around the room Doctors prepping procedure trays, providers pacing and yelling into phones Med students start to fill the room to watch No one seems to be paying attention to you, and a tear rolls down your cheek Your darting eyes met mine The fear, the loneliness, the loss of control I saw you, I saw your fear and I saw the tear roll down your cheek The room was full of people: nurses, doctors, medical students She was sitting on the edge of the bed, holding her mom tightly Her knuckles white and eyes darting around the room Doctors talking amongst themselves, nurses running to get supplies Med students file into the room to watch People moved around her, examined her, but no one paid attention to her Her eyes had met yours The fear, the loneliness, the loss of control You saw it in her too and watched a tear roll down her cheek
In that moment my back pressed against the wall, heart pounding in my chest My hand felt door and my feet moved beneath me No longer in the procedure suite, but alone in the charting room I am being the good doctor, getting things done while waiting for the procedure to start But charting or completing a task list is not the same as taking care of a patient My heart aches and tells me to go back My feet move beneath me, my hand feels the door I step back inside, my back pressed against the wall But you are already asleep, and the procedure has started I didn’t speak up, I ran away That day I forgot the most important part of medicine: treat the patient, not a disease And despite my own experience, I let my patient down One day the room will be full of people again The patient will be sitting on the bed, holding onto their mom Their knuckles white and eyes darting around the room Your colleagues will be rushing, preparing themselves for the task at hand But again, only you seem to see the patient’s fear, loneliness and loss of control This time, slow down, speak up and treat your patient like a human being
Dichtomie
MADHAVI MURALI, M.D. UMKC SCHOOL OF MEDICINE ALUMNA
